The last three weeks have been hectic for us as a couple. Since the write up on irregular sex, the responses have been massive and overwhelming. It’s obvious it’s an issue of great concern in marriage. We have been bombarded by husbands wanting more sex from their wives, thanking me for this eye opener of the danger of irregular sex.
Apart from husbands who formed the majority in the quest for more regular sex, it has also been discovered that in the matter of irregular sex, the wives also cry. This is because an average number of husbands are also guilty of not making sex regular for their wives. A wife said her husband was a disaster in the matter of sex because he is always tired of having sex. Whereas, she enjoys sex a lot. Another one asked if it was proper for her husband to deny her sex in the marriage.
Why are the husbands not regularly engaging in sex?
Let us consider the following in order to unravel the reasons for irregular sex acts of husbands that are making the wives to cry out.
To start with, there are two dimensions to the cry of wives about irregular sex acts of their husbands. One is the non availability of the husbands for sex. Here, it is a case of the man not making himself available for sex. The other dimension is non satisfaction of the wives. That is the husbands are unable to satisfy their wives in bed.
The implication of the cry of the wives is that infidelity risk increases. The truth is that infidelity which seems to have become the rule rather than the exception is one major implication of irregular sex. Spouses that are not satisfied have become easily susceptible to extra marital affairs, on both sides of the divide. In fact, the increasing rate of infidelity among wives these days attests to the fact of this matter. It’s not a healthy situation, thus it calls for urgent attention. Husbands should no longer joke with the cry of wives for sex. After all, what is good for the goose is also good for the gander. We must come to terms with the fact that the prohibition of female genital mutilation has made the female folks to become more sexually active than ever before. Females now know the enjoyment being derived from the act of sex. So, there’s no longer holding back once it’s tasted. Husbands must therefore up the game in order to satisfy their wives.
Ageing process and health challenges are two major factors that impact negatively on the sex life of husbands. I intend to discuss them here in this write up. But other factors of masturbation, poor financial state due to loss of means of livelihood, occupational hazard, and marital conflicts are other factors that could make a husband not to be sexually available to his wife. Finding solutions to each of them will go a long way to address the issue adequately.
I have come to realise that many men are suffering from erection problem, which is called erectile dysfunction, and premature ejaculation. These are mostly associated with the ageing process. Only a few exception abound in this regard. If in doubt, try and gauge the responses to the very many available so called “man power” products on sale in the market, buses, and online. The patronage is massive and overwhelming. If there’s not a problem about male erection, the patronage would not have been that much. Not only that, in the course of my counselling engagement, many husbands, and even some wives are making enquires about how to achieve strong erection and to overcome premature ejaculation. So, the reality of both sexual challenges is never in doubt.
READ ALSO: The danger of irregular sex for couples
Health challenges of husbands also hinder the free flow of sex in the marriage. It’s not a hidden fact that a sick body cannot enjoy or give sex adequately. So, when husbands begin to have health challenges, the wife do suffer and cry out for help. I once engaged a wife who complained bitterly about the poor sex life of her husband due to his unhealthy state. Though not a fault of the husband, but the truth is that the wife is suffering for it. It becomes really painful for her because she is not ready to engage in extra marital affairs. The pain is better imagined than experienced. Let the husbands know that they are not the only ones crying and suffering from irregular sex.
The wives also suffer and are crying as well. Efforts must therefore be made to hear the cry of the wives and attend to it promptly. A wife should not be tempted beyond what she can bear, for constant dropping will wear out even a stone. Let us spare no effort in addressing the cry of the wives for sex. Solutions must be found to deal with the situation in order to avoid its negative consequences. READ ALSO:
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